Halloween is upon us, and aside from dressing as a slutty __(insert costume here)__, drinking way too much and eating a month’s worth of calories in candy alone, it’s the perfect time of year to curl up on the couch and scare the crap out of ourselves so that we can’t leave the lights off in our houses for at least a week.
Let’s face it, most scary movies are hokey pieces of b-movie trash. But every once in awhile, one comes along that really does a number on us. These are three scariest movies I’ve ever seen…good luck:
1. The Exorcist
When I was 15 years old, this movie scared my buddy and I so badly that we had to watch re-runs of Beverly Hills 90210 for 3 hours before we could even think about going to sleep. 19 years later I still can’t watch it…and if I do catch a glimpse of the main character while flipping through the channels, I get scared of going into my own bedroom for a couple of days. PURE TERROR! (pro tip: watch the original version, the remastered version from a few years ago has a couple of super cheeseball scenes that take away from the horror)
2. The Shining
This one didn’t do the same number on me as The Exorcist, but it’s still got some extremely creepy parts that borderline on terrifying. Throw in Stanley Kubrick’s signature film making style, and Jack Nicholson’s outstanding performance, and you’ve got a winner for some future night light inducing willies.
3. Paranormal Activity
There’s something about ghosts in the house that just makes me lose my shit. I’ve only seen this once, and I actively chose to not partake in the sequels. This one gets extra points for being a scary movie made in the last 15 years that actually gets a reaction.
If you legitimately want to be scared this Halloween…watch either of these movies. Don’t worry about anything else.